A bit of a control freak

Not a truly huge control freak. I have done a good job of letting go of control wherever and whenever possible. I don't like butting my head against an immovable object. Just not fun.

The other day, I did a teeny bit of a workshop on directing. Sadly, the people who organized the event didn't understand directing, so it was presented almost last. What? Directing comes first - without directing, none of the other stuff is going to happen.  How many shows does a director walk into and the lighting designer says "So, this is what is going to happen. I am going to give you a light blue cyc with some pink light from the front. Go ahead and direct your scene using that light." Um, never. Or the sound guy goes "I am setting up six mics. Your performers are going to stand right in front of them at all times. Got it?" Right. Doesn't happen. It will never happen. Directing is before all of that stuff. That being said of course, many performances/productions etc. happen without a director, but when a director is involved, it is best to include her or him early in the process. Like the very beginning. Whatever.

Going in, I didn't really have much of a game plan. I didn't know who the students were or what their expectations were. Turns out they were four teenagers who were not very focused. I tried to give them a bit of a lecture about what a director does, but that went over like a lead balloon. So I created a quick scene and let them each take a turn at doing some directing. That worked out really well. The kids got engaged and had fun with it. Good to know!

The other area where I am trying to control as little as possible is with my mom. She, as you all probably know, is in the moderate stage of Alzheimer's - in other words, she is getting worse. I control her pill intake - not letting her self medicate if at all possible. Though I do currently let her use eye drops by herself. I have never been good at giving people eye drops. Even myself. I read a terrible story of a woman with AD (the common shorthand for Alzheimer's) who tried to drink hand sanitizer! Eeek! Anyway, I try to keep on top of everything she ingests, at least in the way of pills. Like head ache pills and laxatives. Joy and rapture! In other aspects of her life, I try to give her choices and options. In the early stage of AD, that sometimes worked. In this stage, it rarely does. In fact, she often walks to the bathroom and asks me what she is supposed to do there. Sigh.

Letting go of control works for me, most of the time. Sometimes, well, I just have to take charge. Yippee.