I'm just a hairy guy

Well, not really hirsute. I mean, I don't have a lot of back hair or chest hair. But I do have a head full of hair. For the time being. Here is a self portrait of my hair as it is currently:

Longer than I thought...

I got a little depressed, though, because of the pictures. There is another one which makes it look like I have a thinning patch. Eeeek! Well, not really, it is what it is. It was just surprising. And it could have just been the light. Or the way my hair was brushed (or not) - maybe the combover wasn't working. Anyway, the mood has passed and I am back in the saddle again. Out where a friend is a fiend, er friend...

Yesterday was a relaxing day. And an unrivaled number of people liked my new profile picture. I wonder if this picture would have gotten as many likes. Doubtful.

Speaking of pictures - here are a few from the Globetrotter excursion.

Mom and I posing for a Selfie!

Globetrotters

Yup, Globetrotters

Mom in all her Glory

 And since a picture is worth a bunch of words, I am going to stop typing for now.

Touch of evil

Is it particularly evil of me to reassure my mom that her assessment of herself in relation to me is accurate? I try to resist the temptation and do the deflecting, disingenuous thing, but many times, the honest answer pops out. Mom says "I am a damn nuisance" and I say "Yes you are." Is there any chance that she will choose to not be needy? Nope. But hope springs eternal. Today it was compresses for her eyes. She ran out of artificial tears and I haven't been to the store to get more. So, to hopefully mitigate some of the comments, I offered to give her a cold compress. "Is there such a thing?" Yes, there is. I put it on. "It's cold." "Yes, it is. Would you prefer a warm compress?" "Is there such a thing.""[Silence as I go down the hall to get a fresh washcloth - warm it up with warm water and return.]""It's not very warm.""It cooled down on the way here." As I walk down the hall, mom says "Why am I sopping wet?" "[In my head "Exaggerate much?!"]"Do you want me to take the compress away?""I guess so. I'm a damn nuisance." "Yes, you are."

Ok, moving on. This blog isn't all about mom - though she is obviously a large part of my life at present. She is not my entire life. Yay! My Saturday - aside from the above incident - was pretty pleasant. I woke up too early and stayed up - with a couple of naps later in the day to tide me over. I wrote a lot of notes - I do love writing. Wish my books had both been bestsellers. Sigh. Maybe another one will be. Anyway, my plan was to do a lot of nothing all day. Except for what I had to do - like cook for lunch and dinner. And that is what I did. I wrote a lot. Played some on the xBox (double XP weekend for some reason on Ghosts). I did go out into the world - got some food at Wegman's - still love to go food shopping - didn't see anyone I knew there, which was surprising - and gas for the car. And that was it. My total foray into the great outdoors.

Thought about the Smith very little. I did take a call from a projectionist who I had forgotten to train on our new power sequencer. Sigh. We muddled through, though, so that was ok too. I did a lot of dishes and got to listen to a lot of my current audio-book - Allegiant - third and last in the primary arc of the Divergent series of books. I made chicken fajitas for dinner. For mom, I mixed most everything together right in the pan - including the salsa. But not the cheese or the sour cream. I really ought to have mixed those in for her - as the first thing she did - wait, I am trying to get away from my blog being totally about her. Moving on. After dinner, I set mom up and went to write and play some more. Eventually, everything wound down and mom went to bed while I watched TNG. I have not reached the point where DS9 comes in. The end, although not quite in sight, is at least acknowledgeable. 

Everyday is another day. I really need to sort through the mail that has been accumulating on my desk. And I do had to go into the Smith to help a projectionist through his first time projecting for us. Other than that, footloose and fancy free! Yay!

Peeling Celery

Hi everyone! What a joyous life one leads when one can peel celery for one's mother! Ok, I don't actually do that. I have to draw the line somewhere. True, I keep redrawing the line, but life is like that. My goal is to keep mom as self-sufficient as I can. Part of that entails letting her peel her own celery! I know, I make her work for her meals. I make her get out of bed. I make her go the five steps from her bed to the chair. I won't let her throw herself down into the chair. And I bring her food, lovingly prepared. Except I won't peel her celery. I just won't do it!

I was napping on my bed (I do like to nap)(it is better napping with someone...I seem to recall that is the case at least) and thought my nose felt a little cold. That was a bit of a surprise. I have had the heat cranked this winter due to mom saying that she is cold all the time (not going to get into it...). I was about to head out to the grocery store and discovered that the temperature controller had died - new batteries needed. Of course, we didn't have any AA's. What a surprise. So I picked a pack of pickled peppers, er, batteries up and replaced them. Woo hoo! We have auto controlled heat again!

I just had a mini-revelation or epiphany-let: when I say to myself (or to someone else) "I don't care." I don't really mean I don't care - I do. What I mean is "I am not attached." I care that you are in pain, I do, I can empathize and sympathize. At the same time, I understand that there is probably little I can do about it other than empathize and sympathize so I will aim for not being attached. "I don't care" just has fewer syllables.

Another thing I would like to mention - when I say "Her Loss" or "Their Loss" in regards to someone making a decision - especially one about choosing not to get to know me better - I hope that it is understood that it is my loss as well. And probably a loss for the Universe - if we are to believe that the point of the universe is love. (For anyone who is following my relationship blog, I will probably copy and paste this there, too.) (Ok, not going to do that - what I will do is put a link there, back to this one - not that there is anyone reading that one that doesn't read this one, I don't think. How the heck should I know. The amount of feedback would lead me to think that no one (maybe three people) read anything I write...

Oh, here's another thought that might be cross-pollinated with the relationship blog - I heard somewhere that authors get a lot action - hugs, offers of sex and or marriage etc. Sadly, I haven't found this to be the case. Then again, not really sure what makes one an "author."

Mine, Mine, Mine, Mine, Mine...

Pixar has some very creative brains. The seagulls from Finding Nemo and their "Mine" thing was awesome. Not so awesome is my mom's version of it. Yes, I am still smarting over her eating my sundae from Friendly's that I really was looking forward to eating eventually. Most lately, she found a bag of pop corn and asked if it was for her. Sigh. Grr. Poo! It was in fact for her, but I was trying to parcel it out. If I give her the whole bag, she eats the whole bag. Partly because she forgets that she has eaten any, partly because, well, she does enjoy eating. Still. Which is a good thing. Just not the whole, sort of, gluttonous thing.

Olivia D'abo...sigh...

I don't know that I am going to make it until I get a break in April. Really. Mom is just being incredibly selfish and greedy and it is really, really frustrating. Tonight, we got some bad winter weather. Slush falling from the sky. Our power lines didn't like it, so out went the lights. I was at the Smith - called mom - didn't get an answer, so I drove home. Sure enough, our lights were out. I got mom a candle, used a flashlight to get her to and from the bathroom and then decided that she would be ok while I went and got Chinese food for dinner. Chinese food had been my plan all along but with the power out, cooking wouldn't have been all that easy or fun. Did I mention the dishes are piled really high and deep in the sink? Anyway, when I got out everything was all snarly and icky. Police and fire had closed off the strip mall. Luckily the Chinese place, Ling Ling was still open with power! Hao! I got a good pile of food - I wish they would give us containers that didn't have separated sections. Whatever. Then I decided to head to the Smith so that I could clean up the seminar I missed and help Nate through his second attempt at projection. Eventually I made it back home - where we were still without power. Candles for everyone!

Now came an unpleasant, for me, part of the evening. I really, really don't enjoy hearing my mom eat. Watching is even worse. Sigh. I sat with her in her candlelit bedroom while she snuffled through her food. It is cute how she discovers stuff - is this salmon? What is this, a shrimp? I guess I didn't get any green beans. Oh, here's one! And then the sounds of mastication. Joy and rapture! I endured it as long as I could and then headed off to my room for a lie down. Not much else to do with no power on. Just as I was closing my eyes, the power came back. Yippee!

So where do the selfish and greedy things come in? After dinner, I gave her a bowl of popcorn (from the Smith) and an apple treat from the Chinese restaurant. I come back to check a little later and her show is over. She looks at me and says "what else is there for me to nibble." Seriously. Not a thank you for the food she has been given. Not abashedly. Just "What else is there for me to nibble." I mean, come on, you had dinner, you had a snack, you fed yourself ice cream. I have brought you food, snacks, out on your shows for you and what do I hear. "What else is there for me to nibble." I am glad I have some self control otherwise I might have really exploded. As it was, I told her that there wasn't anything else just now and she would just have to go to bed. During the time it took her to stand up and head upstairs, I had gotten her fresh cold water and taken her up a fiber bar. Sigh.

All in all, it isn't really a big deal. I have it really easy. I need to chill out and let it all slide off. And the new mom does say she loves me a lot - used to be a surprise to hear it, now she says it five or more times a day. And she seems grateful, most of the time, for my efforts (or anyone's efforts) on her behalf. When she isn't wishing she were dead. That's always a joyful part of the day. Anyway...looks like I have the weekend off from the Smith. Trying to keep my hours down because we don't have a lot of money coming in. I look forward to the day that movies are consistently making money for the Smith. Ok, I would settle for routinely making money...

Up for the duration

For some reason, I am feeling put upon and overwhelmed. Just thought I would share.

I know this is all in my head. Maybe it has something to do with Valentine's Day. Maybe it has something to do with how much work I have to do in the next few days at The Smith. Maybe it is the weight of taking care of mom. Maybe it is something else entirely - relationship/Relationship wise. Who the heck knows.

Valentine's Day was long and dull. I wrote a lot of letters - e-mail notes. My recent pithiest correspondent is signing off for a week and that was a bit of a blow. It shouldn't be, since we have not been corresponding that long. But I really enjoy our dialogue and have looked forward to it. And now I won't hear a peep for a week. Part of me is afraid that after that week, it just won't be the same. Then again, it might be.

Other notes were not as pithy, but I did hear from some nice people. That is a good thing. Not as good as seeing someone in person, but a lot better than nothing.

*******

Back again, after a long day on Saturday. I woke at 5 and stayed up. Work started at 7 for me, schlepping tables. Fun stuff indeed. The more fun stuff was setting up the AV equipment for the Fire-people's training session. I knew that we had to put the small projector they had someplace nearish the stage - I was surprised that it went in the second row! I had the small sound table to use and its legs were long enough to go over the seats nicely. I could have run power from the front of the stage. If I am around next year, that's what I will do. I did run sound from there to the snake which worked out fine. Not all that necessary since the guy's/presenter's presentation had about 30 seconds of pretty useless sound all together. Nice guy, dull as lead presenter. I snored or nodded off a lot. Made for a long day, though. On top of that, I went in later and trained a new projectionist. I think he will get the hang of it quickly! Yay!

Hmm, what happened on Sunday? Not a lot of anything.

And now Monday is history as well. More work. I went in to get some preliminary set-up accomplished. All went smoothly and quickly. Yay. Lunch for mom and then off to the doctor's appointment. Jenny (the aide) got mom dressed and nudged her along to eat her food. Then, while we were gone, she did a great job neatening the kitchen. Yippee!

Meanwhile, mom and I had a thrilling time at the doctor's. Well, I had a nice time at least - chatting with the staff. One of them liked Hello Kitty! :) Dr. Ryan suggested that I make an appointment to get mom's eyes looked at, which I will do. Other than that, no big news. Phew and huzzuh! Quick trip to the grocery store - mom has taken to sitting in the car rather than going in with me. Should I make her go? I don't think so. In any case, I didn't make her go into the store. I got what I needed and got right back out.

Since I didn't need to be back to the Smith until time for the event, I puttered around the house and napped a bit. Dinner was a major glop. All of the leftovers (except the garlic mashed potatoes) went into the pan. Turned out pretty well - and the leftovers of that will be my lunch for the next few days. Yum. I put Hunt for Red October on for mom and went to my event. It was a movie showing and talk presented by Hobart and William Smith. It wasn't particularly well attended but was interesting. And despite having to run up and down from the projection booth and up and down the aisle in the auditorium a few times, I think it went smoothly. I got most of the clean-up done last night - just have a few cables to coil and put away that I didn't feel like doing.

So, there you have it. Finally caught up. Oh, there is a new week in review from my relationship blog.

And I saw Ender's Game one night - Saturday night I think. It was ok, not great. I am a huge fan of the first two books (and the others aren't bad - I am just not a fan of the author, sadly). So I had a lot of preconceptions heading into the movie. I think that overall they navigated that pretty well. I just don't like Asa Buttersworth or whatever his name is. I didn't like him in Hugo and I didn't like him here.  Glad I saw it, but sad I saw it at the same time. Now I need to read the book again...

Busy Day on Thursday

Not really super busy, but we did a few errands. Mom actually got up and got dressed (with some help from Jenny) before lunch. In fact we did not eat lunch until midway through our appointments. First off, blood sucking phlebotomy! We have a doctor's appointment on Monday. That will be a joyous occasion for sure. In preparation for that, mom needed to get a blood test. So that's what we did. Sadly, over the course of six months, I misplaced the paper that requested the blood test, so had to make a quick run up to the Doctor's office to get a new one - which happened without much time or hassle. Like that! The phlebotomist was a bit curmudgeonly when we first arrived but by the time we left she actually had a little smile. Mom can have that effect on people. Sometimes.

Next stop, Friendly's for lunch. Mom does like Friendly's and feels comfortable there. We had a very nice server who told me that I reminded her of her brother who was taking care of their parents. Mom had a fish sandwich and some coleslaw. I had a Reuben with french fries. Mom spent much of the time "complaining" that she didn't get a Reuben. This was mom's complaining "Don't I like Reubens?" "This isn't like any fish sandwich I have ever had before." Etc. Fun stuff.

Next stop was Rite Aid. I had to pick up some pills for mom. And I wanted her to talk the pharmacist about her flu shot. It was a new-to-me pharmacist named after a hurricane. Ok, not really. But she did say that the hurricane touched down on her birthday, which was sort of odd. Again, she started curmudgeonly, but ended up smiling. Yay!

I offered mom the opportunity (ha) to go to the laundromat with me. She couldn't make a decision. So, rather than drag her there, I left her at home. Laundry went pretty smoothly, had a nice chat with a funny woman from Brooklyn who moved up here for a guy. Brought it home and mom folded about a third of it before giving up.

Next, leftovers for dinner! Yum! And quick and easy. I like meals like that. We had to eat early-ish, so that we could get to the Smith for me to show the movie.

Oscar Shorts 2014 - Animations - five are nominated but they gave us seven to watch. I liked most of them. My favorite was Mr. Hurlbot. I also liked one of the non-nominated films - The Blue Umbrella. I think Is there Room on the Broom is going to win. I liked it but didn't think it was great. It was decently attended. I think mom liked most of the films, which is always a good thing.

So, long day. Yay!

I do like Winter

I really do like winter. Not as much as one of my myriad (6) nephews, but I do find it to be, over all, enjoyable. Especially when it is really winter. Not like it has been the past couple of years up here in Geneva. Nor as it was in NC. Here, we are having many days of sub freezing weather in a row. How refreshing. I love the crunch of the snow under my boots. And the top of Seneca lake is decently frozen. I, for one, would love to see the whole lake frozen over. I don't think that has happened since the 1920s. I don't mind shoveling. I don't mind snowdrifts. Or the sound of snow falling. I like icicles. I just like winter. Do I want to live in Winter year-'round? Uh, no. I do like the seasons. So, wherever I end up, I would like it to be a place with seasons.

Mom is making more and more noises about a nursing home. I do wish that we knew what our "must use by" date was. That would make planning so much easier. Our resources are finite, sadly, so I must weight that into the equation. Also, I think she is still compos mentis enough that she is benefiting from being at home. And with the aide coming for a bit every day, I think she is getting a bit more socialization. I am actually meeting with a woman who also wants to help out - unfortunately for pay - so I will see what happens there. Maybe on the weekends for an hour or two? Maybe when I need to get away for a day, she can come in a few hours here and there to keep an eye on mom. Just expanding my support network incrementally.

Finished listening to the second book in the Divergent series. Not surprised to find out (spoiler alert) that they were an experimental society. One more book to go. I read someplace that the main character dies (which is a difficult thing since she is the narrator...). I am, though, going to take a break from those books and listen to a book in the Songs of Fire and Ice Series (better known as the Game of Thrones books).

I am so excited! I bought the first five seasons and the two movies of Doc Martin for mom. I was going to get them on Amazon, but decided to check ebay, just in case. On Amazon, they were being sold for $55. I got them on Ebay for $45! Go me! Saved ten dollars. Woo hoo! (Free shipping on both in case you were wondering) And no tax on Ebay. So I might have saved even more. Double woo hoo!!

Just watched Beautiful Creatures - almost good, very close to good in fact. Lumpy here and there. I didn't really thrill to the lead male character. It comes from a book and I would be that the book is better. Still, I am glad to have seen it.